There is light at the end of this dark tunnel

For the first time in weeks I woke up feeling like life is good. I'm not dreading going to work. I'm looking forward to heading off to the gym in a few minutes. Even though the sky here in the Northwest is dark, there's a promise of "sun breaks" today (a popular Northwest phrase that  means it might rain, but we might get to see the sun too). I feel...well, happy. For the first time in what feels like forever.

We had a new guy start on Tuesday. I'm mentoring him. I'll admit that I was dreading this task. This was going to be the third person I've mentored in the last five months. It's a challenge to mentor someone, and one of my mentors didn't turn out well.

This guy is great. He's easy going, funny, laughs at my jokes and he's super smart (much smarter than myself, but that's not really saying much). It's only been two days, but so far, so good. I have high hopes this one will work out.

I've eased up on myself about the weight thing. I went through a bad few days that included sugary, junk foods. Something I haven't indulged in for quite a while. Thankfully that only lasted a few days, and I've been back to healthy eating for several days now. Although the scale isn't going down, I'm hanging steady at 188.

I decided to give myself a break and stop beating myself up so much for my 30-pound weight gain. Yes, it's horrible, but it's not the end of the world. It's just something I have to deal with, and recently I just couldn't deal with it and my work situation too. 

Now that I've calmed down a bit about work, I feel able to tackle my weight problem. Number one is back to Weight Watchers and back to tracking. I haven't done either for over a month. My best friend has dropped out of Weight Watchers. She just gave up after months of not really trying. I've had months of not really trying too, but I refuse to give up.

Number two, back to reading my favorite blogs and commenting. I've been reading a lot of your blogs, but I wouldn't comment a lot of the times because I felt empty inside. It's hard to encourage someone else when I was feeling hopeless myself.

I'm finally seeing the light again.